Goodbyes, Hellos, & Changes

Time doesn't seem to flow anymore as much as it rushes by.....And time in Secondlife seems to be even more compressed. Some come here and expect miracles...Some like myself come and fall in love with the ideas and opportunities... Some come for reasons I can't fathom.

Goodbyes...

Rose has been a gift in my life as well as a gift to Benares. We met at the Ross info hub when she was just a few days old...She came to Benares as so many have...The place was so full at that time we didn't have our usual guest facilties so I invited Rose to use my house as a place to call home. A few weeks later I logged in one day to see a rather substancial L$ gift had been given me. Rose. The accompaning IM text just said "Thank you". Rose went on to get her first parcel on our west shore...and eventually moved to a private islet when we added the West homestead. She's brought Jakob to our family...and while they have moved in different directions now she calls him still, 'a good friend'. I know he has been to me. I believe in order to stay in Secondlife one must have a passion here...For Rose it has been, from early on, Role Play. Not the (as I see it) demeaning role play some do...but a place where she could expand her senses. Today that role play takes enough time...and with some other circumstances...doesn't leave Rose the ability to use the limited time and resources to enjoy this community as fully as she once did. While she has given up her parcel for awhile...I still call her my dear friend and a part of our family. I will miss seeing her face to face...but we will go on=^..^=

Another goodbye is Rosemary...I received a wonderful note from her a day or so ago. Rosemary and I certainly share one thing in common, neither of us are innately social...and Secondlife is a social venue. She confided to me that she had tryed this platform for a few weeks and while she had found really great places to explore...those places would have been so much more fun if the exploration had been with a friend or partner. She did tell me that her decision to move on wasn't, 'set in stone', and she may well be back...I can only hope so. I did make a suggestion that she stay a bit more and gave her the name of another that I know would also like company. Of course part of me wonders if I coulda/shoulda/woulda have spent more time.. one on one.. with her, if that would have made a difference.

I guess I can finally talk about my friend Veronica leaving...It was a month or so ago...and she did stop bye a few days ago to chat. I say 'finally' :-)... Veronica was another that showed so much of what I call class {for lack of a better word}...She came to me face to face to tell me of her decision. I know little of what happens has to do with me...but people I meet when they are so new the ink isn't dry always have that place in my heart that is shared by children.

This group has just at two hundred members...I purge people that haven't logged in in a year. Most just silently fall away...only a rare few have the class or perhaps the compassion to come and tell me they are leaving. While I won't get into names, I've had a couple from a long time ago do that...and I still think it was a *stand up* thing to do.

Changes...

Barbara has decided to build her Secondlife home on the south shore here at our island. . As I've mentioned before... I remember how I felt when I got my first place. Since then I have had the joy of seeing so many get that same experience...it's a fantastic feeling. It has to do with the passion I talk about that will help keep us connected.

There's a rumour that a former resident may return...I can only hope so.. :-) More later if that does happen.

Hellos...

Limpy and a friend of hers stopped bye a day or so ago. Both Limpy and Nash are estate owners...I've mentioned Limpy before...she had the job/responsiblity of finishing the raising of her younger brother after they lost their mother some years ago. I must tell you the sim almost crashed when my head swelled up so fat after hearing Limpy tell Nash that what we have at Benares is one of only two community minded residential estate complexs in Secondlife that she's aware of. Limpy is an honest business person....pretty much what you see is what you get.

Stuff..

OK..I know this isn't in the "title" but when I read this this AM...I knew it was something I wanted to share.

Aldous Huxley...If the name isn't familiar...It's worth looking him up. One of the important figures of the last century.

This is a quote from such a learned man near the end of his life.

"It's a little embarassing to have spent one's entire life pondering the human situation and find oneself in the end with nothing more profound to say than try to be a little nicer."

And so it goes

Know that you are so loved, brinda

Namaste

Carrying What message?

This might be a short post...as usual..I have little idea where my thoughts may lead.

First..Cinnamons home! She stayed gone twenty four hours...got back a little dirty, disheveled, a small scratch on one eye {just seen by our vet...ok}, and needy lol.

I went to see something for myself today. I find this picture disturbing to say the least. I hope I'm not the only one that sees just how the conversation could go between that new resident to Secondlife and the older one when they happened on this. I know...there are those that will say "Come on...it's a joke...No one's really hurt...Don't look if you don't want to see...

You see, some of that attitude has been used here in the USA in my lifetime. Jim Crow laws. "Colored use back door". "shoot 'em for practise...N*****s aren't human"....It's not that it's a joke..or a cartoon..it's an attitude. There are a few of my friends that know a little bit about some of my old history. I haven't always been a warm and fuzzy person. I'm not some gawky lil geek with a pocket protecter *wanna be* living at Mom and Dads. I have done less than some that may read this .....And you bet your ass I've done a hell of a lot more than almost all of you. I have seen and done evil.

Today..and for a lot of days I try everyday to live a life that, as I've said before goes ..."I try to live my life in such a fashion...that I will not be ashamed no matter what is said about me...even if it's not true". It's not just any special group....it's an attitude. We have such a chance here in Secondlife to move a portion of the world to a place of understanding...maybe not love... that's ok. Understanding.

I've posted before about my lack of understanding on griefing...here and real life. Even the old Mafia contract murder I could at least understand...I believe the Sopranos/Goodfellas movies...You know...nothing personal you understand...*just business*. Here the hate and griefing has nothing to do with control or money...it's just about the "lulz"....the laughs. The total lack of compassion the hate mongers have just amazes me.

If you go back one post to "ROBOT HATE" and read the part about my meeting some one from another country....I know in my heart I did my part in all worlds to carry the message of tolerance. And, you know, it didn't hurt at all =^..^=

I came in-world this morning to a fantastic site...embarassing...but really cool! One of my residents had made a sign in my front yard that said, "brinda we love you". You see, for me, that helps ease the way I feel about some of what goes on in other places. It lets me feel that Benares is something that all of my residents have a right to feel proud of. I certainly am.

Robot Hate & Still Learning =^..^=

I love getting the chance to sit down with some older members of Secondlife and listen to what they have to say. Often on Friday evenings Prokofy Neva has a discussion group that meets to chat about the latest thing going on with Secondlife. Last evening the chat was about the pending class action lawsuits against Linden Lab for seeming to have a laissez faire approach to copyboted content as well as the newest Linden to perhaps deal with this problem. As well as a couple other things. If you think none of this applies to you, myself, or Benares? Well...maybe it does. Let's face it...money makes any world go around. Much of what we have in Secondlife content was created to either make an income directly...or was built to provide a place to sell that content.

BTW.. credit for this picture goes to Prokofy Neva. It was taken just after I left the meeting. I had prefaced my departure saying that my mother had cautioned me about sitting in dark places with mechanical men. Further explanation?...Search , 'Crap Mariner', =^..^= that's who broke out the sign! Polyhistor sent me an IM giving him up. I IMed a tease at Crap and he promptly sent me the sign. {Remember the first rule in Secondlife?...HAVE FUN!}. Also check out his blog! Too funny. Sometimes.

I'm so happy that there seems to be no end to my learning...hopefully here or real life. Last Eve I was trying to show a new resident to Secondlife how to work with her inventory...how to make a little sense of it. How to close all folders...sort by date etc. I took screen shots to try and demonstrate...just wasn't getting through. And I so understand...my close friends caught hell working with me...{and sometimes still do}. One of my newest friends Barbara was watching patiently....finally sensing my frustration she chipped in her suggestion... {clic Map...you can access landmarks there}! I hadn't used that option in so long I had forgotten about it. Problem solved. And I too got to learn.

Had a wonderful chat last eve with a person from Saudi Arabia...My first from that country. If I remember numbers well...USA residents are not a majority of the population of Secondlife...just as USA residents are not a majority of the world (although so often we act that way). This young woman wasn't the first that was a little tentative in telling me where she was from. Her concern...a concern I had heard before..was that because of the radical religious views of so many worldwide and the blind hatred generated that I would snub her. I was so glad to be able to explain to her that while Secondlife has our share of everybody...I personally haven't seen much of anything that shows anything except tolerance towards all here in Secondlife. And of course for those that do know me I love to add my personal thing...."BTW, We Buddhists just don't get that excited about your religion....or lack thereof". :-)

We had one of our little get together impomptu meetings in front of my house last eve. Let's see if my memory's still working {cause I was slacking and didn't pict!} Breye, Poly, Barbara, Bubbles, Kiki, Selea, and myself. Breye hadn't met Bubbles before and was waiting around for the Swedish bunny to get out of bed :-)... Kiki had just TPed in from HI217...Polys there most all the time ready to do whatever needs to be done. Barbaras found a home with us and seems to be content there...Selea dropped in to log out at *home*..my kinda girl! We used to do more of those meetings...but that was before we grew as big as we are now and got kinda spread out.

This isn't Benares news...but the Benares family is my family...Cinnamon is missing this AM...how she was let out/got out...I don't know. Shes almost seven and never been outside and I'm worried sick...but...all things are impermanent...and everything will be as it's supposed to be. I do dread adding another stone next to the temple though.

And so it goes

I love all of you, brinda

Namaste

Responsibility...Personal...Public

Watching things...Real life news...Secondlife news...Benares news. Sometimes the three most dangerous words in my vocabulary are... "I've been thinking".=^..^= I wonder often about my motives...Are they self serving? {Sometimes} Do I do the things I do for the good of all? {Sometimes} In any life I truley believe that a large measure of personal responsibility is paramount to both personal growth..as well as the growth of the society we live in. There is also the responsibilty to call out publically when we see..."The Emperor has no clothes". I'm fortunate to have a couple of people in Secondlife that will come to me and say..."Where are your clothes?" Real life news? Ugg! rofl Secondlife news? There is a lot going on... little of which directly concerns me here...{so far} Benares news.. We have a few new people at Benares... Skyler is out at the SW corner of Benares West...while very new to Secondlife she has extensive previous experience in other PC venues. She has taken the time to actively help other newcomers to both Benares as well as Secondlife in general. We have Marnius and 'Winter' at the SE corner of Benares East...a real life couple that are still very private...Marnius came to Secondlife some time ago and 'Winter" (my nick name!) just weeks ago. Quinby...A delightful girl! Benares East north center... So excited to have her first home :-) {I still remember how totally overwhelmed I was with my first place} I've asked DESIRE Halsey to go around to all the current residents and either take their picture or ask for one for the coming yearly "Memories" photo album. She will also be taking pictures of the resident parcel builds. DESIRE has been here at Benares for some time...her first visit to our home culminated with, "I want to live here!". I've mentioned Bubbles before...If you see a tiny bunny at your place thats her. Shes our tier manager...her job here at Benares is to make rounds every day and make sure the tier boxes are all up and running. Bubbles can be a little shy...but the sweetest person ever. btw... if your using voice she may not hear you :-). You may see a couple of other new people here as well. Machele is one of those new people that come to Secondlife and land running. So very caring about the feelings of others...She seems to be having a ball exploring...I so want her to find a passion here....passion is what keeps us. {Passion about things..lol.. not, "him" or "her". Barbara is the newest....Barbara is from Berlin...and I see so much of me in a lot of how cautious she is on one hand...and yet how excited she is with the almost infinite possibilties here. I was able to spend perhaps thirty minutes max with her yesterday showing her the very basics of rezzing a box...moving it...adding a simple rotation script. And then I get to hear a certain incredulity when I can honestly tell them that they are doing at a few days what I wasn't doing until weeks/months later. Coming news?.....We may add another sim just north of Benares East. Nothing set in stone just yet but one of our members is contemplating that venture. Any potencial build that direction will add value to this complex and will fit in with both our look as well as our theme. But... back to that earlier bit concerning responsibilty... I will continue to caution my friend that Homestead sims are and expensive thing to support... But I will also help and support whatever decision they choose. And so it goes My love and respect to you all, brinda Namaste

Friends...Old and New...Memories

Friends and Memories...

Always a subject that we can identify with.

Twinkle Villota came in world for a visit last eve...How wonderful! Twin...I miss you so much and yet if you were still in world everyday, my days are so full now we still wouldn't have much time together. While my Secondlife daughter Lala was my first friend...Twinkle was only a few days after. Twinkle and Lala had very different goals here in Secondlife...although they aren't but about eight years apart in real life age...the circumstances of location, family responsibilties, and culture give them very different goals.

My lovely Secondlife daughter is here to shop, party, shop, chat, and shop =^..^=.

Twinkle came for the technical challenges and to earn some income. {She didn't know when she met me that she came to teach!}. Last evening after the obligatory, "How are you"..."How's Benares"... "Have you thought about using a plugin to access your tier boxes from the Web?" {still the business woman!}. We got around to old times.

Memories. Secondlife seems to have an odd effect on time...At my real life age.. a couple years just seems to fly by. In Secondlife May 2007, my rezz date, just feels like it's so long ago. Twin remembered who introduced us {Angie}, My first 2048 parcel at Arrazura, Her first house at Tussock. We laughed about us hanging in the air next to a sixty meter mega prim sign I made for her shop at Lythria with her trying to teach me how to map the texture...{I desperately wanted to crawl through the cable all the way to SouthEast Asia and strangle her :-) }...How we thought that getting Benares made us BIG land holders.

Other people...other places...other times.

Here in Secondlife...at least for me...there is this deep bond that I have with those I met when I first came. It's a bond that seems to survive not chatting for long periods with some...and yet when I do IM/chat...it's like only a day has passed. I'm thinking of my Katina, nicknamed Kat...three or four months sometimes go bye...and either she or I will send an IM... "meow", that followed by a *HUGS*. That's it...no long song and dance... Just meow. It's enough for us to say a thousand thoughts. Such a precious thing.

Others have long gone...and still I mourn...dear Riggley...gone these twenty seven months now, and still once a month or so I send an IM telling her simply that I miss her.

I was able, a day or so ago, to finally lay down a self imposed emotional burden I had looked at for nearly a year. A secret I felt was best left unrevealed. I believe the way I handled that situation will leave a dear friend of mine a memory she will long remember.

A new girl has posted a notice in her profile telling all that read it how thrilled she was to have had a little help from me. She will go on to change that :-) {I'll suggest}...But what I did see was that someday I will be her memories.

I owe her and Secondlife to be a good and fond memory.

I owe that to all that meet me, both here and in real life.

While I'm not perfect... I do have one thing that I do believe and try to live....

"Let me live my life in such a fashion that I will not be ashamed...no matter what is said about me. Even if it's not true."

And so it goes.

You are all so loved, brinda

Namaste

Change...Sometimes Painful...Always Certain

Talking with a friend this AM...I hadn't seen Veronica in some weeks. My gosh...You see, so often, I remember people as I first see them. In most cases default avatars that aren't that great..{before they started to work on them }=^..^=.

Today she looked absolutely wonderful. In our chat we got to the whys some people make the choices they make in Secondlife. Keep in mind that this woman is, as far as I know, a success in her real life business life. She sounds well educated...and likely has a good grasp on how life anywhere works. Except here in secondlife.

Many of us have no concept of why real life people would want to break anothers windows...or paint their name on anothers walls. In this internet society why there are large groups that have as their stated purpose the griefing of anothers Secondlife experience. Those groups do exist...I'll not publicize them here...if you need specifics, google Secondlife griefing.

We owe those people a debt of gratitude though.. as odd as that may sound. If I hadn't been griefed so often at my mainland sim...I likely wouldn't have created Benares.

There was a moment at that mainland sim {Lythria} that I didn't expect. When my early friend Twinkle and I decided that we needed land for me to learn about being a landowner and for her to have a shop... we found a place that had Governor Linden land backing it..{access}. And it was at the end of a walkway at a large developed Japanese Waterfront sim...{traffic}. The sim had shops...art...and two large giesha houses. Giesha houses...not whorehouses...theres a difference.

Change.

About three weeks after we got set up....the Japanese woman that owned the entire complex abandoned the land and moved back to Japan. My skybox rentals overlooking this fantastic view were instantly just skyboxes...no view. That was my initiation into Secondlife mainland living where you have no control over what your neighbor does.

Life does go on... Twinkle, Ling, Lala, and Myself went on and gave it our best try for several months. We created a beautiful place...something not that common mainland. Finally, I too gave up...sold my extensive lands to the land bots for sixty to seventy percent of what I'de paid for them. And we all came here... that was January 2008.

I don't know why the Japanese woman left....I do know why I did. The griefing just wouldn't stay stopped...the Lindens did what they could...but as long as we have free access to Secondlife.....

The sad part. Something that today I can still see.....

One day a few weeks after the Japanese woman left... I saw an avatar just sitting on the land a third of the way across the sim. Curious..I went to see. It was the first time..but not the last.... that one of the Japanese gieshas came to sit and mourn.

Her home, her SL job, a piece of her culture..... gone.

And I know today why I am here at Benares. And I promise all of you that you will never log in to a home at Benares only to see that notice .."Your home location is no longer available..You have been moved into a nearby location".

And so it goes.

I love you all, brinda

Namaste

Watching the Gift

Maybe this post should be titled "Bits and Pieces" =^..^=.

Just got a weathervane gift from Boyd....How cool that he would think of me. And also cool that I did actually have a creation that I could share with him....a waterwheel...of course my first *whine* was when.. for whatever reason... mine says creator unknown.. lol. I've learned that while I'm actually pretty good at , "reverse engineering" stuff,... I'm just not an original thinker. Even my waterwheel was something I saw at Fate Gardens. Khamon Fate has made a lot of changes there over the years...has wonderful trees for sale... all are copy... so one is all you will need. Did invite a close friend there to see that she got a beautiful fountain... was just easier to get her there than it was to contact Khamon and see that it was gifted.

Got another gift today early.... Met a new avatar last eve at HI224...spent a little time helping to dress her up and answering her questions. Today at HI224... the same avatar. She asked me for a "text prim"... {says Hi! I Can Help} to wear over her head...she wants to stay there for a few days and help others as she was helped. She and I spent over an hour there helping new Secondlife residents before she had to log. That was wonderful...just takes a few of those to help me see that what we have in Secondlife can help change the world.

Logged in here at Benares to make my rounds....see if anyone needed anything. Had to reset Sabres missing tier box.... shes busy involved in a brain cancer awareness program. Just another indication of how the people here at this Island care about more than themselves.

Had a long chat with Ling last eve....and I'm already seeing some changes to her parcels. Must tell you that whatever she does...it will be wonderful. Today I went back to her first house location in Lythria....Wow!...The changes are so dramatic. In a future post I will tell the story of that land and the sad thing I did see in the weeks after I bought that huge parcel.

Last story for this post.... Bubbles!!! Bubbles Muggins is usually found as a tiny bunny. She comes to Benares often... stops by morning and eve {her time...9 hours East of SLT} just to say hello. Shes a delightful girl...shes just about a year old here in Secondlife...and is interested in making new friends. Bubbles isn't a senior citizen like me lol....and neither of us makes friends easily... so that might not be age related. What she has found is that good friends in a virtual world where theres anonymity to conceal true motives can be difficult to find. If you see her around just give her a shout....you will see that her name is perfect! =^..^=

And so it goes...

My love to you all, brinda

Namaste

Mentoring....easy? Sometimes.

I truley love Secondlife...And I hope anyone that reads this comes to feel about Secondlife as I do. The first time I logged in was on dial-up. While all I could do at first was to wait for a really long time to even see anything....when I could, I thought OMG! I've got to do this. Next step was to get broadband and here I am two and a half years later... it's gone by so fast. Actually at my age everything goes by fast =^..^=.

I've mentioned before about my first days in Secondlife not being that much fun...fascinating yes...fun? Not so much.... frustrating? Yup! And I've chatted about the first person to take time to help me to feel like I did belong...like I was important to her. She came to SL in late 2003...when as another old member told me...SL was a lot like high school. When if they logged on and there were 50 ppl on line....IT WAS A PARTY! lol. Everybody knew everyone else.

Where I'm headed with this is to mentoring others...to doing more in SL than just fixing my own self interests. In real life...(and sometimes SL) I'm a 'type A' personality...and while I'm not into country music.. there's a song line that says, "The beat ought to go a little faster" :-) Here in SL the beat will only go as fast as the avatar I'm trying to help can dance.

Last eve I had at least four types...one was so quick...took less than perhaps five or six minutes to change her clothes, hair, shape, skin, shoes, and give her a lot of folders, notecards, and landmarks.

Another was quick but was an avid mmolsrpg gamer and had a lot of questions.

The third was a lot like I was...very slow...got most of the ideas...but was overwhelmed.

Last was the kind that I personally find painful...first there was the language barrier...even with a transator some ideas just don't sync. Then you never know about their connection to the net. And lastly...there's an intellectual *click* that it seems to take...not everyone *gets it*. I see them log off without saying anything and it makes me feel badly.

A lot of people have heard me say that I try to teach as I need to learn. {Hmm... there's that line that, "We teach best what we most need to learn"}. I teach that ...one and one are two, and one more is three. A very close friend is an engineer real life.... very bright...but she's not a great teacher...she immediately goes to , "square root of nine". Yes, both answers are three...but in order to communicate with anyone..I have to speak their language.

Just sat here frozen for a few minutes...looking at that last line. Intuitively I know that to teach love and compassion I have to communicate love and compassion. I try..I really do...forgive my relapses.

I logged in early this AM as an anonymous alt :-) ...One that has zero friends on her list and one that only one other person knows. Had to do a little research and got to thinking.... I came to Secondlife wanting what I guess everyone wants...to be popular and successful. Careful what ya wish for..Haha..{and don't stop IMing me!} So now when I'm in a hurry to do something for me, thats what I do.

Today I wanted to get the Slurl for a free translator, you never know when it can be of use.

One of my acqaintances here in SL is Ferd Frederix. Another brilliant mind...he now provides that Google translator free at the Help Islands. You can find his translator at Phaze Demesnes 230,225,23. Or search for Ferd and look at his picks.

Second I wanted to put up a picture and a little text here of the person that really did make me want to stay. She's no longer in search and I don't know why...I can only hope life finds her well and thank her... as well as hope you all can make as much of a difference in just one life here as she did in mine.

I Love You All, brinda

Namaste

"Your World...Your Imagination"

The title of this post comes from Linden Lab some time ago...I don't remember seeing it recently. Before I get too far down the line here....Just as a matter of record. While this blog isn't on Linden servers and isn't constrained by *not repeating personal information thats not posted on a persons public profile*....I certainly will always observe your anonymity. I was reading anothers blog this AM...where the current post was about what people do in Secondlife...{where we can be anybody or anything we choose.} Only one of the things I treasure about our place is that we have a sense of community..or I hope that all of you do. While we do have some of you that do RP...you leave it there when you "come home". Actually theres only one of you that I do know what RP she's into. And that's as it should be...no *big brother* needed. We have several real life couples here, and I think another couple coming , as well as a lot of singles. We are nearing the last quarter of the year... a time for holidays. If there's a group desire for a social event please let me kno. Last year we did a halloween party. That brings me to my prim story...Most of you find out that so often we need/want more *stuff* than we have prims for. I have finally found an upper limit for me......{finally!}...it's 22500 prim. Last year Lala did the halloween decorations...mainside gets 15000 prims. I ended up with 6 prims left. Not 6000. 6! ROFL Last year I did a photo album scrapbook....If you would like a copy just let me kno...or........... Start sending photos to Mamie Alter. I'm also thinking of asking a person I know here to go around and get some pictures of both your places as well as you yourself..I want to make a new one that has all of the ppl that are here now as well as the "How It Used to Be". Please set full permissions on any photos as well as names. A special thank you to Skyler...she's taken someone new under her wing...I believe thats so important here. Ling has "killed " the hard drive in her PC :-(.... If anyone wants/needs to reach her you can either leave an "off topic" comment here. Or leave me either an in world note...or an Email RL at brinda.allen.sl@ Gmail.com and I'll see that she gets it. Brook Sutton was here the other day.... saw her on a visitors sensor. Brook is a friend from when we first came to Benares. She stayed with Ling for a few months before going on in Secondlife... :-) Since I still see her coming to see what we're doing, I kno she too has left a lil piece of her here. For that I'm so grateful. OK...that's enough chatter today... Always know that you are so loved, brinda Namaste

Bits and Pieces

Just a few random thoughts... There's something that we all hear in so many ways throughout our lives...and today I find it so funny that, at least for me, I didn't truley *hear* it. A very good close friend of mine in real life calls this phenomena, "The gift of ears". I'm thinking of a song lyric from long ago that..."Just because you can see the stars doesn't mean you can see the light". {Boy is that the story of my life! :-) } Where I'm going with this has to do with volunteering our time and resources both in Secondlife as well as real life. As some of you know I have two great passions here in Secondlife. One is this labour of love called Benares. I hope a place of love and compassion ...a place of peace...a place of fun. I have been so blessed by having so many residents contribute to this dream...not only financialy...but in the prevailing attitude. I get such great pleasure from seeing the fantastic effort and talent so many put into their place here in Benares...I get to watch ppl riding vehicles around the sim...see Jakob running a jetski across 3 sims...Allie and Laurali doing the things that young college age girls do...ppl shooting themselves out of cannons. And yes..the occaisional gunfight...{where no one got angry} =^..^=. My other passion is showing new ppl that there are those in Secondlife that are willing to help. As I've mentioned before..I was given the gift of friendship a few weeks into this life...a charter member helped to make me feel that I did...*belong*. I've met two ppl in the last couple days that have been such a joy to work with...Skyler and Rosemary. Perhaps the thing that's made any help I've given them so enjoyable is they have..."The gift of ears". They both have extensive experience in other virtual venues and understand that the easiest way to have a measure of early success in anything we do is to listen to those that have gone before us. There are a few things that I've learned in offering help. One is that if the other person just goes AFK and doesn't ask or apologise...or just goes off into inventory and won't listen?....I don't get upset. I offered.... that's it. I gladly just dump all of the free folders I have that can help... and move along...no life revolves around me. The other thing equally important for me is a lack of expectations...any help is offered freely...no one ever owes me anything. And because no one *owes me anything* ........ I get everything. =^..^= As always, I love you all, brinda Namaste PS: In previous mentions of those that do so much for the good of all I've chatted about 'Caro'..If you have a few minutes... Please check out this URL. This is just one of the things that some of our residents do here. http:/www.rezlibris.com/institutions-a-organizations/info-island/481-alliance-virtual-libray-goes-back-to-the-basics.html

Growing

Had a chance today to see a couple things that give me much joy. First was when Skyler sent me an IM early to perhaps give her some pointers/advice/help on rezzing some sealife she had gotten for her beach. Now when I came to SL.. I wasn't about to ask for any advice/help/pointers...{my gosh.. what if they think I don't know}...ROFL. You see a default nooblet? They don't know! When I get there, the dolphin was a creation that I hadn't seen before. My best efforts at trying to position it were to no avail... darn thing had a mind of it's own. Over the next perhaps 15 minutes though, I watched as Skyler figured it out. All the *help* she got from me was an "atta girl". And so often that's what we really need. More about this in a few lines. Real life called and I logged for a bit...when I returned I saw one of my newer friends at our guest house. I love to see new ppl come here and take up our offer to use that facility. The sign on the front says it quite clearly... "Everybody needs a place where they belong". While it's possible to have a Secondlife with a free account and no parcel or group land, for most of us it just feels right to have somewhere we can just.. *be*. OK..A few lines later =^..^= Linden Lab is, if not slowly deleting the Secondlife Mentors program, reducing it to just a few. Mentors have gone from 7000 or so to around 1500 or less today... and there are no new ones coming. Power corrupts...absolute power etc. ...many Mentors just ended up with the title for the status. Some, and BTW...I have a list of the ones I've worked with...are ones that are here to help... I know there are many others. Many of these Mentors are just doing the Mentors program...IE: showing ppl where to look in the knowledge base for the.. *how to*...there is a place and a need for that. I love to see brand new avatars ... stop and chat for a bit... show them how to delete that darn pink dress...give them a few free clothes, a pair of sparkly heels, some decent hair styles, a few info notecards, and a skin that isn't like grade school paste :-). Send them to NCI hubs..or Hyles..or Help Ppl... anywhere but the *Welcome Areas*.. And listen to how they talk now that their self esteem has gone up. Secondlife or real life...how we look and dress has a lot of impact on how we feel about ourselves and those around us. There are a lot of ways to contribute here...Boyd I've mentioned before...his thing is... *someone that listens*. Rarely found alone. Breye...always busy... works so hard at helping ppl enjoy the *Wild West*. Makes Secondlife easier for so many. I've a former resident that spent quite a few L$ repaying debts that a former significant other created. This took her months, they wern't her debts, and she had to earn that money in Secondlife... That kind of ethics improves life for us all. Some days I really feel that there is hope.... that the future can and has started here...that if we work at it-- just a little....it can work. Love always, brinda Namaste

Transitions

That old saw about, 'The more things change ..the more they remain the same'. I have had a remarkable chance in Secondlife to have a front row seat to watch change. Change in others as well as change in myself. Some changes seem at first to be growth...some I guess might be growth in an odd direction. Which is the *correct* direction? Probably only seen clearly in retrospect. New things. New people coming...some just passing thru...Skyler staying. One thing I've seen before, and it's always the same, is that moment of fear, panic, and yes, joy...when we rezz our first house. It happened to me certainly! Gosh that seems so long ago...{the panic when I accidentaly deleted the second floor I clearly remember as well lol}. Thank you Minke Bailey..(she was there in minutes to fix it). If you see a tiny bunny running around.. stop and say "Hi".. thats Bubbles... Bubbles is from Sweden and so very funny...Guess I'll need to go get more flags for the telehub. Polys birthday... A year in Secondlife seems a lot longer experience wise than a year real time...certainly for many of us there's an intensity here that we don't see RL. I suspect almost all that see this blog know Poly...I am blessed by having her both as a friend and as someone passionate about Benares. BTW....If you see her at log in?... haha.. please give her a few minutes before we all bomb her with our percieved problems via IMs :-). I remember her first "hello" at Isabel. There's another member of this team that rarely gets any.. *airtime*.. Ling. And most of you don't get the chance to see behind the scene to see her input. I was reminded of her a couple times this past week. As she has said ,Ling often watches from afar. It's not a question of dispassionate observation...I think it's allowing ppl to grow at there own pace. More than once she has opened her own home to new ppl...given them a place to stay and grow. Always a dear friend...and a much better judge of ppl than I will ever be. I remember our first meeting at Apollo. My SL daughter has had to learn about how we all suffer from having a terminal illness...growing old. She lost her Godmother a couple weeks ago. Lala, I love you and treasure watching you grow up. While, when we're young, we see a death as such a terrible thing...as the years go by... this passing becomes just, "the way things are". That's enough rambling for today...I am so glad to see your comments. I have had a few of you comment to me personally as well. I believe that we all are better served by communication. There are situations that have happened everywhere...Benares included...that would have possibly turned out differently had my communication skills have been better. Maybe better late than never. I love you all, brinda Namaste

Happy versus Right

It's usually hard for me the figure out that line between being...* RIGHT!*...and being happy. Recently my struggle with that has resurfaced. One of the original things I read from Linden Lab was their motto, "Your World..Your Imagination". I came to Secondlife nearly 900 days ago and while my first days and weeks here were not... 'happy joyous and free'...I wasn't griefed, teased, or spoken to badly. Sadly that's not everyones situation...all one has to do is go stand around at MooseBeach info hub or Waterhead welcome area for awhile and watch and listen. I bought my first estate parcel at Arrazura around June 2007, about three or four weeks after I came to SL. It was such an experience...I met Lala, Twinkle, and Ling while I was there and got my first lesson in prim control..{or the lack there of}. All of those ppl came to the mainland with me and together we built a nearly third sim beautiful open landscaped area for all to enjoy with rental houses surrounding the park. I was happy. And then I had my first experience with ppl that..."Their World..Their Imagination"... concept was much different than mine. Griefers. Self replicating prims...obscene particle spamm. After spending an inordinate amount of money it became clear to me that while I was acting.. *right*.. just abuse reporting the situations and never getting actively involved... it wasn't where I could be happy. And so the idea for Benares was born. My theme here, and the operating policy has been based on peace and love. And for almost the entire existence of this sim we have been so blessed with residents that embody those qualities........ While there are others..{and I will get around to chat with all of you I promise}......I had a chance to chat with a couple of residents yesterday who both carry those ideals. Early in the day I got an IM from a resident that lives as far east as our estate goes. Andor is wonderful, a person that treasures his privacy here, and when I set up the East sim we specifically made a parcel out there that I was sure he would like. If anyone is flying around and see's him out there...stop by and say hello. He's created a fantastic garden... {look for the beehive..I had no idea} :-). Go as far east as you can....look for him. Then last eve Desire came up to my front yard for a chat. Desire is another that doesn't spend a lot of time into anyone elses business. Beautiful, quiet, loves building. Amazed me early on....I looked at a walkway she was creating that mite be a lil high on prims...I sent her a mega prim and a texture....next day I saw she had used it and perfectly mapped the texture. She was about a week old! She had "party neighbors" for a week or so....never a word.. just read the covenant and put up a nicely textured wall so she didn't have to possibly offend anyone. The other side... Stuff I just don't get. Ppl that constantly seem to be a pain where I sit. One of my good friends has a great line in her profile "likes and dislikes"... she dislikes ppl that have a profile line that says they are, "drama free"...(rarely). I have 'issues' with ppl that come to our home and prim litter, or create scripts that don't seem to have an "off switch". Ppl that come to a place I have spent literally several thousand USD and try to coax ppl to leave for their own selfish reasons. Ppl that go to nooblet locations and grief, harass, or waste resources. We have an opportunity in Secondlife to create as close to a perfect world as we will ever see. Why waste such an opportunity? I have a friend in SL..someone thats been here since 2004...a person that has done much to improve this experience for all of us. There's just one thing that I see as a problem....{for him}...I'm sure it's a learning experience for me. At what point would I rather be *right* rather than *happy*? Attachment is pain. It's not always an easy choice.
I guess I'm not finished here =^..^=
I love you all, brinda
Namaste

नमस्ते

The Right Thing? I Hope.

I try so hard to do the *right thing*...I wish I could tell you that it's what I learned as a young child. Actually it's stuff I hope i've learned from paying an incredible amount of *pillow tax* over a lot of years. Sometimes I wish {just for a moment} that I could easily return to the ideas that kept me alive for so many years of abusing myself and everyone around me. Last eve I had to do things that I've put off for some months...I neednt go into a lot of details...theres just a couple of residents left that would remember the original situation anyway. When I meet new ppl...ppl just sometimes minutes old here in SL...in some ways it's like having a new child. You have some children that come, grow incredibly fast, and leave home almost as quickly. You have others that enter your life and stay for so long. And yes...sometimes you get children that may decide that the opportunity here is not for them. All share a piece of my heart...and whether they leave quickly or slowly... as the text on the tori gate over the walkway to the south shore says, we all leave a part of ourselves here on this island. A day or so ago one of those 'children' has decided to pursue a dream that has taken her to a place in SL where she can realize that dream. I'm OK with that...she's following the first rule I try to express to all new ppl....."Have Fun". (I have that in quotes 'cause I got that from my friend Ling). Am I sad?..absolutely. Am I happy? Sure...cause I want all to be happy. Will I miss her? you bet! The *right thing*.... I have had to face the apparent fact that not everyone has my best interests at heart....{what a suprise huh?}. I posted on anothers blog yesterday that I attempt to live here in SL with this philosophy. If I like, respect, and I can help you , I will. If I end up not liking you, if I don't respect you, I will leave you and everything about you alone. There are at last count something like 32000 regions in Secondlife...there isn't time to visit them all.... and there certainly isn't time to attempt to interfere in anothers life. While I have stopped ppl from coming to Benares...It's always been a situation where I felt the interests of all the residents was {and is} the most important thing. Abuse someone here...you're outta here! Try to crash or seriously lag the sim? pooof! I have recently had to take a look at whether someones actions cause me personal financial loss. I think perhaps they did. Residents pay me real money to have a beautiful, fun place to enjoy SL. I have a responsiblity to provide all of you with great service. Thats why there are managers here from about 5AM SLT...{Ling Hotshot}...Me, off and on during the day and eve, and Polyhistor till the wee hours. And I have a responsibilty to provide you with an island to log into. Rest assured.... this estate isn't going anywhere. The *right thing*? I've stopped a former member from coming here. As well as removed that person and another from the group. Only twice before have I ever removed someone from this group. I don't like this....it doesn't feel good....and I'm hoping that it was the *right thing*. I love you all, brinda Namaste

Old Friends & New

Had to re-Edit this post...Sometimes I wonder if I will ever find stuff as easy as some of you seem to be able to do :-). Old friends:...I did get a chance to chat with Twinkle a day or so ago. Many of you today have never met her...and yet Twinkles the reason we have a place today called Benares. She was my second friend here in SL... and likely the most patient person I kno. When she and I met, I had about 90 days experience w/PCs. Had no idea of even basic things like copy & paste..{not much better now lol}. Imagine how difficult it could be to teach someone the basics of PC use *plus* SL from 12000 miles away! {and yes..there were times I wanted to strangle her! :-) }. Twinkle, Ling, Lala and myself had a place on Lythria and after dealing with constant griefing for some months I decided to buy this estate. I knew I didn't have the tech skills to handle this, but Twinkle promised me she would stay for a year until I could take care of myself, & she did! After she ceased having an active part in running Benares I found out that she had done this for all of us while having a lousy bandwidth PB {no media, draw under 64 meters, all in all a less than desireable SL experience. While it like to broke my heart when Twin started spending most of her time in real life...I had to realize that if she hadn't, I would never have grown. Today Twinkle has graduated from college with a degree in engineering, works for the Bangladeshy government at a power station near Dhaka, still has a small place up at 700 here, plus a rental 1024 parcel on the south shore. I am forever grateful for Twinkle Villota...a lot of why I feel about Secondlife as I do comes because her. New Friends: I had, as always, a great time recently meeting and working with new ppl. One is Deb00 ... she came to SL from another VW ,'Moove". Shes such a joy :-)... she goes exploring... IMs me wanting to come and chat about what her experiences were. Seems a very open young woman, I hope she stays. Another fun time for me was being able to personally do a lil *search and locate*...I was able to find a rather busy french sim for Lotus...Lotus had spent a few days off and on on HI217. And she really felt she would be happier where French was common. We found an avie that was able to steer us to just what Lotus needed. Benares friends:.... I've chatted with a few of you here on the island concerning using this blog as a way for all of you to perhaps post about stuff going on with you...or to just be *in touch* with our neighbors. While some of you were close friends before you came, we have a couple that truly treasure their privacy. We are a lot more spread out than we were almost two years ago and I've been told by a couple of ppl that a big part of what we try to offer here is a sense of community. Posts to this forum are welcome...if you're post seems... 'off topic'... thats fine. I'm going to attempt to not "moniter/moderate" comments. I kno we can remember the first rule of SL...HAVE FUN! =^..^=